a little update

a little less our daily bread-ish, a little more of me. i'm not trying to be narcissistic but i think my preaching is boring people.

and so i more or less think i am settled down in my new school, new life and new groups of friends. i have yet to really get started on work but the prospects of doing so is daunting yet exciting at the same time. 12 years of spoonfed education and now i'm thrown out into the open to fend for myself, i foresee massive culture shock.

anyway...

i find it ironic that most of my readers are christians, when i had hoped that it would reach out to non-believers. do not get me wrong people, i love my readers, and am thankful for their comments. but i really wish that i am able to make a difference in at least somebody's life.

i finally went for oikos (cell group) last friday, and i shared with them my disillusion at being surrounded by unbelievers and my inability to share Christ with them. i am thankful that i did because i was encouraged by their reminder that we can bring Christ to pre-believers by setting a good example as a christian.

i have also learnt that preconceived notions and established impressions are hard to shake. more about this in another post maybe.

whatever the case, this is a race (or rather, marathon) i have chosen to run, and i will run until i see His face.

chapter new

i've been busy lately trying to move into hostel, a quaint little place facing the foresty area on the edge of campus. the prospects of university life is exciting but scary at the same time.

till next time.. =)

out of the (nkf sheltered) well

methinks it's about time i did a little commentary on the real world out there again. yes it's "the secular issue" again.

but before that, i really must thank God for answering my prayer for pastor tay's word on sunday was one of great comfort and encouragement in the aspect of evangelism. many thanks to my fellow brothers in Christ who offered words of encouragement. =)


anyway i simply have to comment on this juicy one:
the big secret about nkf is out.

when i heard about it, i was valiantly trying to suppress the urge to yell "I TOLD YOU SO!"

i've always been skeptical about our good old national kidney foundation. why is it that other charities could survive without having to mobilize at least 80% of the staff at mediacorp, while nkf (and maybe renci) is the only poor thing that regularly holds a gala fundraising (complete with luxury cars/condos/what have you not to offer)? just as i've always been against those people selling $5 coupons for imaginary orphans and handicapped elderly folks.

with all due respect, i know that those patients are a bunch of people really in need of help and i sympathize with their plight. i also understand that those medical fees can be a huge liability for some people and having community support for such people is great.

furthermore, aren't christians supposed to be charitible folks?
i'll leave my views about stereotypes for another post.

my view on charity is this:
if i want to do charity, i'll find my own way of helping and serving people. giving money to organizations who will probably pocket your money to buy first class air tickets is not my idea of doing charity.

what got me riled up is the irresponsible way a certain person of some authority tried to hide behind the protective arm of the law by threatening a lawsuit against a journalist who wrote something possibly defamatory and detrimental towards his public image. whether or not that person really used public donations for personal use, i would not comment.

the thing about singapore is if you've got power, you can pretty much do whatever you like in here (other than commit murder of course.. even then...)

if someone wrote or said something unflattering about you (read: a*star/acidflask, straits times/nkf), it is 99% untrue (because YOU said so!). when that happens, the other party has two options:

1. author/speaker would be subjected to the humiliation of having to do this public apology and shut down or cut off any access he has to publicize his views to prevent any more misleading articles that might confuse sheep.

2. author/speaker has to hire a lawyer and make those trips down to the subordinate courts. (in this day and time, this is no joke. public transport fares are rising faster than you can say "tibs!" and you need the cash to pay your lawyer's fees later.)

singapore is not corrupt. but it sure helps if you are somebody.
gives me another reason to detest this filthy world we live in.

it ain't easy to be me

"many people come into christianity expecting easy solutions to difficult problems. but when i came into Christ, all hell broke loose!" - dr. kevin van de westhuizen

just returned from my sci freshman orientation camp in ntu. i set off with a prayer for God to give me an opportunity to "plant a seed", to share Christ with someone i just knew.

i came back and the only times i talked about Christ was to the christians in my group.

i'm not sure what happened but something tells me that God is trying to teach me a lesson in evangelism. i have always thought it would be easier to talk to people whom you're not really close to. i guess i was wrong. be it to loved ones or to new aquaintances, evangelism is tough work. nobody said it was easy.

i saw the target, i prayed. i tried to speak but nothing came forth.
i feel discouraged yet... encouraged?

i know i am not talking sense here. it's 00:39 in the morning for goodness sake!

maybe i'll talk more about my freshie camp in another post. i'm still zonked out from the entire week.

spirit - willing; flesh - weak

and the saying goes: "the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak"
almost cliched but you always hear this line in that apologetic tone, sometimes sheepish at the speaker's seeming inability to get something done.

today that phrase took on a whole new meaning for me.

i wanted to go for my first oikos (cell group) but hey whadaya know? a whole truckload of factors happily hindered me from going. what supremely irritated me was the fact that i was down with a bad headache and mild sore throat (plus a possible infection of my gums rendering me slightly speech impaired) and that at the time when i'm supposed to prepare to go out, i suddenly felt really sleepy.

the spirit was hyped up and ready to go. she had her best dress on, bag packed and shoes strapped on. she was smiling and jumping and eager to take off. but the flesh was still in that dingy old school tee and shorts, lying dead on the bed and praying real hard that the suffering will come to pass.

i say that phrase, but without apology.
i am not even sure what to feel now.

pastor tay's words kept echoing in my mind: "the spirit man must be stronger than the flesh! must fight against the inclinations of our earthly nature!"

ok so those were not his exact words but hey, the meaning remains the same.

i think i should be ashamed of myself.