moved. =)

http://paper-roses.inthecrush.com/wordpress

frankly, it's getting a little tiring to toggle between livejournal and blogger, so everything will be consolidated there. after all, my walk with God should be my life.

don't worry 7km/h will still be around. =D

overloaded, sleepless night

it's 4 a.m. and i'm still awake. mun just went offline after counselling me a bit over a few things that has happened in my life.

i was pretty bummed out because i keep feeling condemned and helpless at my inability to release my bitterness to God. granted, my friend in the aforementioned post disappointed greatly, but it's no excuse to harbour unforgiveness in my heart.

it feels like shit to have to keep on listening to lies from the devil. mun asked me to list out some of them and i realise i am being fed the weirdest of lies i have heard so far: that i cannot shut the devil up.

of course by myself i can't. but by the blood of Jesus, i can.

thanks mun. i said the prayer you typed for me and i feel more peace now than i ever felt in the past couple of months or so.

i'm feeling pretty much burnt out. the past couple of days have been spent in my gen12ii boot camp that is designed to prep us for our mission trip and getting some of the admin done. so much to the extent i nearly neglected the following:

outstanding stall!
flea market @ tampines ave 4
12-13 may
1600 - 2200h

come find us! we're selling cookies, clothes, accessories, stuffed toys and a whole lot of stuff at cheap prices. all proceeds go into funding the two mission trips that i'll be going for.

much love to the outstandings. i appreciate you guys.

the pride of life

a friend (W) and i were talking about a mutual friend who i recently deem as officially backslided. a few people in church have been asking me about her.

W: i think you irritated her, seriously.
M: what did i do?!
W: i assume you tried to get her back into church?
M: half-hearted attempts i guess.

half-hearted attempts because i am not confident in getting her back to church. i know her character and i know i am in no position to force her to do anything.

whenever we broach this topic i find this really ugly feeling rearing its head within me. maybe it's a form of bitterness towards my friend for treating God as one of her three-minute playthings. once she's bored with God, she throws Him outside the window and that's the end of the story.

maybe it's just me. so what am i supposed to do now when Scripture specifically tells us not to let any bitterness take root in our hearts?

J once told me that the reason why he backslided was because religion seems to be a conditional thing. it's like a i'll-go-to-church-if-You-do-this deal between him and God. so now he decides to depend on himself - if anything screws up, it's his fault; and if anything goes well, it's his effort. i wonder if that is the same case for my friend.

pride is a dangerous thing.

as i write this, my heart is breaking all over again.


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i lost my train of thought.

don't think i'll be writing anything relatively profound for the time being. that is, if any of my stuff has ever been profound.

i should stop being so harsh on myself.

in pursuit of happyness

i went out with a friend today and she asked me a question that stumped me:

why do some people lead such charmed lives while the rest of us can't be as happy?

while i have been thinking and reading up a little bit on contentment and happiness in the Lord, we are looking here at people who are without God in their lives and still are leading lives with little or no hiccups. perhaps God spent a little more time with these people or something.

so... any views?


maybe i'll write more on this later...